Surprise Surprise, It's Your Birthday Stupid

Two rum-dipped cigars lie in my drawer. I've had it for three years. I don't smoke. But these cigars were one of the unusual gifts I received for my birthday in 2003. Not sure if I'd try them one of these days. Though, they look tempting.

This year, turning 27, I was pleasantly surprised three times in a row. Sunday to Tuesday. One per night.

Surprise # 1

On Sunday, I was supposed to pick Su Anne up to Murni's. Trish mooted the idea of us catching up before the week starts. This all sounded fine. Except for the fact that we were to meet at 10.30pm on a night before work.

Then again, I have crazy friends.

Silently, I wondered if this was their idea of pre-celebrating my birthday - at a mamak. I shelved the thought while speeding 120km/h to Su Anne's place because I was like 20 mins late. Called Su Anne upon arriving, only to receive no answer. So I thought she was getting ready.

While waiting in the car, Anne's little bro pulls me into the house to watch the last marathon lap ( I think to myself "What the hell for?") and thought probably he's into running and wanted me to share in his joy over the marathon victory.

Her porch, filled with her relatives cars, made sense why she wasn't ready yet. Then Su Anne pops out from behind. Grinning. Excited to see me watching the marathon. Then I see familiar faces draw closer to me from the porch shouting "Surprise". My buddies from church were there, ready to embrace my stunned expression. My mouth wide open, brains half-fried, and sweat glands half-empty (okay kiddin abt the sweat glands), I realised I had been surprised. There went all hopes of dodging another year of surprises.

But, I'm glad I was late. I heard all 15 something of them were hiding in the garden half an hour before I got there. Oh, and there were mosquitoes. Thank you Lord for mosquitoes. I knew You had a reason for them.

I have crazy friends.


Surprise # 2

By Monday, I grew smarter. Jess had asked me to mamak with Chin Hor and Jo (my Chindian sis) in Bangsar. I couldn't smell a fish in this whole arrangement. Because, mamaking with Jess, Chin Hor, Jo (James, Mei and Kia Meng) was already a norm. So nothing fishy. Or so I thought.

You see, Jess needed to stop by BSC to get something for her colleague. My surprise-O-meter beeped a little in the carpark and I blurted "This isn't another surprise thingy izzit?"

To which she brilliantly replied, "N0 lah, yesterday surprise already what.. Aiyah you thought it is .. bla bla bla.. " basically I was assured there was nothing fishy.

We get to the lobby, and Jess forgets the name of the place where her colleagues stuff was to be collected. So she calls her 'colleague'. We escalate to the fourth floor. And Jess takes me to Alexis Bistro to collect the stuff. By now I realise that I've been duped again.

Jess tells handsome waiter, "Table for four". So we sit on table for four. And Jess says, "... actually its just me and you. I wanted the cushion seats... so i asked for four people." By now I'm thinking if should actually marry this girl (ha ha... kidding. Really.)

Then suddenly, Mei walks in. "Hi, surprise! James can't make it." Okay, so now I'm surprised that Mei is here and that James couldn't make it. We order dessert and drinks. Moments later James walks in with Kia Meng. "Surprise!". So by now, I feel like an actor on the Trumman Show. The other surprise was Jo and Chin Hor couldn't make it. We engaged in a few engaging discussions which cover movies, politics and ghost stories/experiences.

Jess drops me home. Right before I get off the car, Chin Hor and Jo pop out from Jess' back seat and shout "Surprise!"

(Okay, okay the last paragraph was bull. But that would have sounded awesome eh?)

Surprise # 3

Tuesday, being my actual birthday, made me wiser and surprise-proof. This time, I call them out for mamak. Okay, so I was surprised that Vin was there. Nice to see you again. I told Cheng Yee in the morn to get Selena and Anita. Turtle came too (my roomate in Thailand). We met at SS2 corner coffee shop. We chat, make polite jokes and dine. After almost 2 hours, we head to our cars. I made a huge, huge mistake by parking opposite Cheng Yee's car. Never, ever, ever, park your car opposite Cheng Yee's on your birthday.

While approaching the cars, Selena turns around and sheepishly asks me "So how's twenty seven like?" Things were getting fishier when Vin decided to get interested in my answer while trying to distract me from watching the activity going on between Cheng Yee and Anita at the car. "Why you distracting me from looking there?" I asked.

Suddenly, my pants are wet from the barrage of water balloons. Then Cheng Yee brings out his secret weapon: A can of whipped cream. By now, I'm a wet piece of fruitcake with whipped cream. But I was wise. Cheng Yee left the car door open. I get in and close the door. "Don't be a party pooper lah" taunts Selena. So I get out of his car with his umbrella.

The firing continues. A passerby notices the water-violence and stares at me. I ask him "Help." He stares back at me, walks along, stares back at my attackers and me and walks along to the mamak. And so I get creamed again. Cheng Yee decides that my car needs a similar treatment. The girls take their aim too. Vic, on the other hand did his guerilla photography with his handphone. I take my shot at Cheng Yee and Vin with a little whipped cream. I also shampoo Selena's hair with some and Anita's arms as well. They squirm a little, emphatising with me.

The ammunition ran out and we decided to go home.

The people in my condo lift knew I smelt funny. I heard "bau" mentioned in their private conversation and when our eyes met, they offered a forgiving smile.

I have crazy friends.

I think I will smoke those cigars.